ifnotmewh0. You will grow to enjoy them. I dont have many friends and no hobbies. I should have probably explained more sorry. It's a bit weird when a guy has a ton of friends, none of whom he's really close with. Welcome to AskWomenOver30, an inclusive Reddit community where people can ask question to and discuss topics with women over the age of 30. Although every person and story is individual, these are the most common reasons why someone may find themselves as an adult with no hobbies or passions. He really enjoys watching television and I don’t, but I want to spend time with him. ChildesqueGambino. Also interested in hearing experiences of relationships where your friendships have merged as one, versus having fairly separate friends (obviously She has no friends, and no hobbies outside of her garden. You don't have to ask a million follow up questions though. With hobbies and interests, it means they have things they’re interests outside of me and our relationship. Same here. Learning graphic design (game-niche) Learning choreography (game-niche) Reflecting on life. Depression. Especially since it seems you do things for him you don’t love. Discipline. We've been going out for about 2 months. For me, I have to work to remind myself that having a life outside of them is healthy, and they need a life outside of me. You kind of just have to keep doing things until something sort of clicks. And don't get me wrong -- that's very thoughtful of her. There's no need to share hobbies at all. Let him figure it out, if he cares, he'll make time. She may have an idea and want to do it together. 4. I'm a girl. She knows that going into dating you. No matter what the truth is: He doesn't respect you. ) writing traditional classical music (piano pieces, experimental audio recordings). I’m married and my husband has hobbies like playing video games or building model kits. I think hobbies are for the "me time". Relationships. It got to the point where I was embarrassed to show an interest in things, and would hide a lot of my hobbies from him (e. I feel this. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost 3 years, and we've lived together for exactly 1. It's disturbing to me that you have halved the amount of time you spend doing the things you love. Then also do your hobbies. Everyone tells me to say goodbye to all my hobbies like the kid is 24/7 (Which in a sense they are, as I My last 2 relationships were just like this! I wanted to go out and do stuff, exercise, explore, get outside, etc. Jul 25, 2022 ยท There’s also an increasing sense of needing to be productive at all times, so doing something with no purpose feels like a waste. All are welcome, please read and abide by the rules in our sidebar. Nothing expensive. Sorry in advance for the long post: I (28M) work as a middle manager in my organization and make close to 6 figures. You want to stick with a hobby, so you need to incentivize your effort or find something you actually want to be doing. I can force myself to do stuff (like I coached my sons cricket team last year) but I didn’t like it. All of her hobbies are actually my hobbies that she gets into sort of half-assed in order to appease me. Im a bit of a introverted person, I need my things to wind down. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. Girls who i chat with wants their partner to love and take part in their hobbies, or have a mutual one. A man who loves you would be proud of you. Reply reply. My partner is very much a "loner" and doesn't have friends either or do much as far as hobbies. If you just don’t like/have interest in your partners hobbies, you can find something that both of you have not done and perhaps pick it up as a couple hobby. i used to have a ton of hobbies i actively participated in growing up, drawing being one of my all time faves and i got advanced enough digitally to start selling pieces at $100-$150 a pop. •. ginny_and_draco. 337 votes, 87 comments. ) playing the piano 3. I imagine I'd lose interest in someone who has no interest of their own. This made me think I'm not really a character to get We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. You don't have a right to all his time, and I don't think you should get involved and tell him how he can and cannot spend his time. PS. Whatever you end up doing, I think ideally it’ll be something that’s a repeat event/activity where you get to see some of the same people each time. He doesn't drink or smoke. A couple/few close friends, however, is what I actually prefer. It doesn’t matter what it is, if you enjoy doing it and have a passion for it, it’s a hobby. Fish at 6 picnic at 11. These activities aren’t I have 5-6 concrete hobbies with a sort of ADHD related 1-2 week obsession hobby intermittently. Hoping some more like-minded women will have some insight. sleepishandsheepless. "Oh, not much. When I say that I want to go do my r/simpleliving. Partner has no hobbies and I feel suffocated sometimes. I took this approach ten years ago. I grew up hunting, fishing, camping, hiking and mountain biking with my dad every weekend. He just keeps me in the loop all the time. Hell, it's boring for us who participate in it. Maybe if he had some hobbies, he could get together with people with similar interests, but honestly, I couldn't really see myself doing this. Vent. ) Think about it, if a man is comfortable with you doing all the work then he really brings nothing to the relationship. If i doing it, i want to be with myself or with friends and if i want be with my partner i do something else with her. Hobbies are not about the results, they're for your own personal enjoyment. We have joint and separate tl;dr: Husband has no hobbies and I want to find something for us to do together and for him to enjoy on his own. Won't hire a nanny, won't accept help. daleonfire. This could be a reason for not having any specific hobbies. It's so hard every year. I'm just down and feel like I'm wasting my life away while everyone is making meaningful connections and bettering themselves and I'm just sitting here. He likes NFL but not into memorabilia. Now I'm with the best guy ever. Take piano lessons for 6 months and never go back. His hobbies are: video game, and 3 times a month he goes out to meet up with a group of people to talk politics over dinner. MembersOnline. But she needs to support your hobbies too. He had no hobbies, no job, no desire. Hello all, I'm 22M and she's 20F. I wouldn’t necessarily unmatch. Is considered by some a hobby (I don't consider it as a hobby, it's more important than that) however, some do consider it a hobby to educate others while maintaining the knowledge. Couples don't have to enjoy 100% of their hobbies together. My husband and I have been married 26 very happy years. We both read. He sees you as someone to either look down on or to manipulate, but not like someone should see their partner. My girlfriend has no hobbies but me. Something out of your fridge. Like they weren't worth his time, because his interests were 'better' than mine. We do have children which my husband calls the most expensive hobby we have. It should be give and take. That's normal. When we first started dating, everything went well because we were able to spend time together. They meet friends but like maybe once every 2-3 months. You’re assuming she unmatched because of no hobbies. 31 no hobbies, nothing interesting. We have a great relationship generally and also have a baby. exactlytttttt true. Make sure you spend time with her, even at the expense of a hobby. My [28 M] girlfriend [29 F] has no friends or hobbies. Literally only played video games. Both my partners only had interest in indoor "hobbies". They just need to be able to accept their partners' hobbies as part of their partner's interests. We have never fought, we are still very much in love and affectionate, and other than this everything is great. No partner, no hobbies. Weekends are all about us thinking of stuff to do together and although i really enjoy these times and love her dearly, sometimes i want to spend it with my friends or have a good session of gaming They tend to have deep-seated identity issues where they were trying to conform to the expectations of others and buried their own wants, needs, and desires as a child, just like many of us. Reddit has abandoned the users, the moderators, and countless people who support an ecosystem built on Reddit itself. We didn't care about religion or politics or anything else back then. When we first got together she had a roommate, her best friend If your boyfriend having hobbies is the key to you staying with him or not, you need to reassess the relationship, seems like your thought process is rather shallow. We both like hiking and kayaking, and are currently working on fixing up his hobie cat so we can go sailing this summer. a person without hobbies who sits on the couch playing with their phone for 4 hours at a time is, frankly, boring. We have things we do together and things we do with friends or alone. Interested in hearing your experiences of being in relationships with a partner with whom you have the same hobbies/interests, compared to ones where you have both had your own separate activities. my ex shamed me for smoking weed all the time and it was a big dealbreaker to date someone who didn’t have the same tolerance to drugs as me. I have school and work tho. He's into building guitars and computers. depends what the hobbies are. One of our common values is that of respecting each other and recognizing that we are different people who enjoy different things. And it's because I want to occupy myself to prevent myself from feeling lonely. I am now getting back on my feet post partum and wanting to start my own hobbies again and see friends more. It does not make me any less or more interesting because I have a hobby. If not you’d be like me, someone without much hobbies or interests, so I latch onto my boyfriend like nearly all the time. My life is so boring, no friends, no partner, no hobbies. My husband and I have been together for a decade now, and while our values, politics, pace of life and goals align perfectly, my husband has no hobbies or interests. I will say, the best thing about covid was spending all my time with my partner (now ex, but still fp). And in a relationship, you should be equals, partners and a team. ADMIN. Cook at 530 games at 730. To start we have been together 9 years now. He showed no interest in my hobbies, and would make me feel pretty worthless for even having such interests. Flip it. Me and my wife have been together for a little over 3 years total and married for 4 months. I miss hanging out with friends but it has gotten harder due to COVID when we can’t just meet up for after work drinks in midtown. No friends = red flag. Still pisses me off to think of it. And the cycle repeats daily. This shit is cyclical. You should figure out your bills and have him pay a percentage equal to how much he contributes. They have way more friends than I do and I feel our time spent apart is very different in that they have a healthy well-rounded life of hobbies, friends and seeing me whereas my life consists of mostly seeing them or running errands and looking forward to seeing them. Reply reply More replies. I am a 25 year old woman who had friends at school but since everyone moved away or developed busy lives, I have been left with no friends to do things with, never had a bf though I do regularly go on dates from dating apps but just haven’t found that ideal person yet. Being lazy , no motivation, no hobbies, etc. As long as she understands the compromise you guys will make. Many people have friends from their high school or college days, but if he did not do those things here, then he's shit out of luck. Well that's all fine and dandy however I really would like it if my girlfriend participated or tried to learn the games. hobbies are easy: if you ever did something for at least an hour on your own free will, and liked it, that's your hobby. However, she has very few hobbies, and she never really pursues them. because hobbies and interests enrich your life, thus making you a more interesting person and 2. now at 23 i work and come home, sleep, eat, social media everything this girl does with a slight hint of video games Male and females out there. The issue is not that you suck at every hobby you try, it's that you care so much about sucking at a hobby that you put it down and don't pick it up again. You tell him you need more time with him. I don't want this to come off wrong, but just to give some context. Saying they have “no” hobbies is a bit harsh it’s just what I assume is the case as they seem to get almost annoyed when I express I want to go do mine instead of hang out or something. Take some time to learn about your partners interests/hobbies be it just in knowledge or even participating in it (big +pts). I have a job, go to the gym and then, on top of that, have to care for myself and take care of duties around the house. If the guy dont take part in them, the girl dont want anything from him anymore. Gyms have personal trainers on offer, hire one, that will solve both your lack of knowledge about exercise and the anxiety. So I'm trying to get advice on how to handle a man who has a lot of hobbies. She had no identity, hobbies, etc. Most people my age already finished college or are about to finish, most of them have jobs, and some of them are already making good numbers. Edit: thanks for the responses so far. my hobbies are watching movies and walking. My mom is a prime example of why you gotta have your own hobbies. Although he's emotionally supportive and my type physically, I feel like sometimes things get so boring between us because we don't have a lot of interests/hobbies in common. Clearly, to him, you are not. Author Nostalchiq. If she doesn't want to, then she doesn't have to. Tbh I feel like it should be a necessity. I would scratch my head at someone having no hobbies. 3. Here's my two cents there. Breaking free of the work/spend/borrow cycle in order to live more fully, sustainably, and cooperatively. Also, people are allowed to unmatch if they don’t like your reply. I also have tons of indoor hobbies, though. Has hobbies, interests, passion for things. Tonight when I turned up, no one was really enthused that I hadn't seen them in ages. You may not be healthy living this way but there are some ppl who are so introverted that they don't need anyone. No interests besides church and being a homemaker. I really do want to think of him as a friend first rather than jsut someone I can be They blame everybody and everything on the depression, trauma and use it to justify their actions and behavior. ADMIN MOD. Alskdjfg1. My hobbies include: 1. • 11 days ago. I think sharing some interests with your partner is important, but it's good to have your own things as well. And when you get bored, put them in a box and go buy some yarn. I'm a full-time college student pursuing nursing. We do projects together sometimes though or play games or organize at-home date nights. Not just of people, but of anything. There's no need to drag her along for hours of boring practice, qualifying, racing and then pizza with the guys. "That sounds fun! Well, gotta get back to the grind. All were on the tv; games and watching stuff. SomeArtist. He's always been this way for the most part, so it isn't new. I'm 22F, and I can proudly say I have no hobbies. We both attend the same uni, and met through classes. He's never going to be a writer, and I wouldn't expect him to be one, but he reads my poetry when I ask for feedback and he attends my readings. Full text: Reposting this here since I didn't get much help from the other sub. But she has interests I don't care about (k-pop and and knitting for instance) and I have interests and hobbies that she finds weird (recreational math, miniature painting and riding unicycles). Say your monthly expenses are $1000, and say that you make $3000 and he makes $1000. Sure, I've "Liked" the women I've dated in the past but I've had much more enjoyable times with those who have hobbies, 1. I, too, tend to make only a few close friends, so it would be cool if we're on the same page socially. Going to the gym can also be a venue for making new friends. I (F22) don’t know what to do I have no interests or hobbies outside of being around my partner (M26). Please read Call to action - renewed protests starting on July 1st and new posts at r/ModCord or r/Save3rdPartyApps for up-to-date information. This is very easy. 108 votes, 56 comments. But that's about it. . Here’s the thing, I have been asked as to why I don’t choose to make a career out of my hobbies. then life hit me like a train and by 21 i had stopped entirely. I'm into writing and drinking tea. More and more I realize that I want someone with drive, someone with ambition. I play too, heavily at times(I have 1,086 hours on Destiny 1 alone. Work, kids, tv. Basically, she won't feel the need to change for herself, but there is hope she will change so she doesn't cause you pain. I work as a Software Engineer during the daytime, and fortunately most of my hobbies are at home hobbies (Electronics, Programming, some video gaming, board gaming, gardening). And then its me, haven't properly started college yet, no job, no friends, no contacts, no future projection, no life. So many men are so selfish and one dimensional. Usually, they're my fp too. Naturally when that's how you spend your time your friends are also into Every time I try and do my hobbies (play golf, go on my PC, workout) my wife makes me feel like I'm not present. so I feel like I feed off that energy. Video games and politics are about the 2 things I hate most. " It's hard to make friends as an adult. Ultimately I didn't. Sometimes if his actions say that he wants to be laid back and be happy to float along in life. She got interested in someone else. Most of the time, her alone time is spent binging shows and movies, scrolling on instagram, etc. Yeah, it’d be cool if you liked collecting vintage coke cans, or scuba diving, but chances are, only the other people who indulged in said activity would really care. In the beginning he didn't have much money so we'd spend time together at his apartment or get drinks somewhere, maybe visit the beach. You don't have to go golfing together, but you should have an activity you want to do alone while your husband goes golfing because you both value spending time separately, either alone or with friends. We’ve tried different hobbies together but they never stick. In the beginning of our relationship, id go with him to some of the politic meetings but I didn't talk much and he didn't like that. A major component of a cultural and personal identity. We did just move to another state, so I'm going to Goldbelly some hometown favs. We are multi-millionaires and she refuses help with the kids (2nd on the way) of all sorts. I, too, have this issue in my relationships with my partners. I have no hobbies. But since I didn't ride motorcycles or golf or dance certain dances, I didn't have hobbies. 1. Help! Just realized I haven't bought a thing for my husbandHe has no hobbies. I think that sharing common goals and values is far more important than sharing common interests and hobbies. Once that message sinks through, let her know that this hurts you. For some reason I find it really fun to Photoshop pictures. berryberrykicks. Title: Husband has no hobbies or interests. All that really matters is that you're satisfied with the time you spend together and that if you have separate hobbies, you don't feel pressured to quit them just because the other person doesn't want to participate with you. 2. My husband and I have very similar hobbies—gaming, movies, and music—but we also have separate hobbies. I love gaming, as does my current BF) but I also have interests outside of them. Swipe right: Scuba diving, free diving, kayaking, running, skiing, hiking, photography, cooking, and travel. For the first, reassess how you qualify what you are doing. . My partner and I (both early 20s) have been together for a year, and my relationship with them is great. Or a million other reasons. It's 2 different groups. Hello all. You just say your needs aren't being met. I do have a best friend but he lives an hour away so we don’t see each other much (talk everyday via phone/messenger/meme exchanges). On weekends, they stay at home to rest, gym, and just recharge for the week ahead. Katara23. I’m gonna cut in here, even though it’s a few days past. Hobbies are great for "you" time - I like the fact that my partner has little interest in my hobbies. Maybe some extra attention just a few hours a week on top of what you already do together may make a difference. I've (21F) been dating a guy (25M) for about 4 months. I just left the pub where I met up with my sister, her housemate and a bunch of friends I use to be able to have a laugh with. I (37F) wish my husband (42M) had interests or hobbies. I don't care about a hobby. I'm a boring person to talk to, I have no hobbies or interests. Develop some new hobbies, you don't have to be enticed by them on the outset just willing. believe those actions and not be blind to it thinking you can change him. It’s hard to make that friendship connection right off the bat but repeated exposure helps! 3. when I started working and spending less I thought I would all of the sudden have time to do the things I thought I would enjoy. My husband and I are both introverts and have been happily married for several years. If your partner has no hobbies, just goes to work, comes home, eats dinner, watches netflix and sleep. my [25m] partner [25f, dx] sometimes makes me feel suffocated because she doesn't really have any hobbies, other than occasionally getting on kicks of art-related things. My (29F) wife has banned me (31m) from all hobbies. He likes tools? He has everything he wants or needs. You gave us a couple reasons why you feel you failed, and those seemed easy to present. Swatch the paints just to see the pretty colors, organize and reorganize them just to feel good about having them. I cling to my bf all the time and he clings to me all the time too altho he has some friends and some hobbies. Just say enough to be polite. She may have decided to delete her profile. No common hobbies/interests. Get embroidery thread and a book. My ex boyfriend said this to me. g. HELP! Wife has no job, hobbies, or friends. I've been married a long time and never begrudge my husband his interests. As a person with no hobbies myself I don't feel like you should break up if he's not leaning on your excessively to fill the void. We’re together all day everyday but when he occasionally wants to do one of his hobbies or I have to do something that he can’t come with me to do (like appointments etc) I feel empty and like I’m on pause till he comes back. I have a lot of hobbies. Choosing a life partner that shares your views and interests today does not mean this same life partner will share your same views and interests tomorrow. You don't have to like The Bachelor, but you should have something you want to do while your wife is watching it. If your spouse is happy and does not cramp your style, he probably is happy. I have a great work-life balance and am able to spend plenty of time at home unless I'm on a work trip which happens on a quarterlery basis for a couple weeks. When you come home tired from work it’s fine to want to spend your off-hours doing things that don’t count as ‘hobbies’, but things you enjoy doing that require minimal effort: watching tv/Netflix, talking to friends and family, scrolling through tiktoks, drinking (within limits), eating comfort food, etc. I’m finding it hard to speak to my partner about as I’m conscious he doesn’t have any hobbies or much of a social We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. 14. Personally, I read, do some scrapbooking, craft projects, and cooking. You don't have to like everything that she does as long as you can do things together that you do enjoy. My brother and I are adults and now she feels so out of place because her life was about her husband and kids. I know my little chosen hobby is boring. Obviously, there's a certain amount of listening to your partner about stuff you're not that interested in that's expected, but that's easily done if you enjoy hearing your partner enjoy things. It’ll emotionally drain you and my best advice is to end it unless he’s willing to step up. BoutsofInsanity. Building computers and mechanical keyboards, making music, collecting old computing shit, 3D printing trinkets on thingverse, shooting, etc. This following is what I do: Learning web development. I have a ton of things I'm really into- homebrewing, paintball, playing bass, comic books, working out, cooking, video games, going to shows for local bands I follow, intramural hockey and baseball, a bunch of fantasy sports teams, I have season tickets to our LAX minor league team, I'm taking a bartending class for fun right now, the list goes on. During her relationships she dropped her few friends and now she has no friends. Award. Nice to chat. if it’s a big part of your lifestyle (drinking, going out, drugs, exercise, etc) then it’s fair. Maybe one or two. Stay homego somewhere with your gal palshave a mani/pedifigure out what's in the 'sewing room' that you haven't set foot in since 2020. We’ve talked about this a lot, try hobbies, they don’t stick, then leads to just watching television. While we were on a hike that I wanted to go on--- because it is one of my hobbies!! He quickly forgot I bake and paint and paddleboard. That takes care of making friends. We’ve both suggested things to try in and outside the house but he doesn’t have an If you bring it up as a way for you to spend time together, that will go over better than telling her you hate her hobbies. ) Researching history or current events 2. What have you been up to?" People generally love to talk about themselves. BUT, the worst part of all this, is I might be starting to feel resentment about my Tell her that the relationship and your emotions are becoming strained because she has no outside world. He has a bunch of nerdy hobbies - MTG, DnD, and online gaming. He would send me pictures and texts all the time even when he's with his friends and when he's doing his things. [deleted] ADMIN MOD. He has to be ambitious in the first place, and he has to place importance in the role as a leader and a provider in the first place. A hobby can be anything. He should pay 25% and you should pay 75% (4,000 together, you make 3/4, he makes 1/4). I was 22 and he was 25 on our wedding day. Then force yourself to stick with it at least long enough to know if you really dislike it or if it feels like a chore instead of a hobby. Reply. My mom just got a divorce in her early 50s. If I was your bf, I would dump you in a quick minute. It's hard for me to imagine being in a relationship where we can't make each other laugh. I thought I would The man has, like, a zillion hobbies, so it's not hard to find a couple we share. This is toxic you should be with someone who is at least willing to do things you like even if they don’t love it. r/simpleliving. It's okay to just create, to just do. It seems strange that your relationship has progressed for more than a year when the both of you seem to laugh freely with other people but not with each other. 27. During the COVID lockdowns I remember we tried to get him into Male and females out there. ( ex. I don’t particularly care what others hobbies are as long as it seems like we have something generally in common even if our hobbies are different such as liking outdoor activities, fitness, etc. But again, it's not enough. My girlfriend (43) has no hobbies or friends that she is able to spend time with and its making me (38M) feel like im her only source of excitement. I do a ton of things. Instead of having hobbies, I did interesting side jobs. You’ll find that many have no real hobby, but there’s the many every day social things that most of us enjoy, but don’t particularly qualify as a hobby. This, 100%. kh il ha tz em qx pv cp eq na